Purpose

Sometime ago, when "Back-to-School-Blues" was the looping-soundtrack that accompanied the latest "nagging-issues" episode of my living-showreel, I went into "meditation-mode" to find myself thoroughly shaken by self-doubt.

The following incomplete-post drafted then, only sees the light now:

***start***

For who am I working for?

It has dawned upon me that I might not be so independently-driven as I thought before.
I shrug off (too-easily) doing any "work" that pertains solely to myself; but (over)zealously seek out activities that fufill a greater group's intentions. The group project takes priority. Band practice is important to me. The lives of my family, friends and loved ones take precedence. There used to be so much to do for them. So much I could obtain a sense of fufillment from - in having "served" them; for what I always saw as mutually worthwhile causes.

Father~!
Mother~!
Gawd!?

What is it that I can do now? Now that I'm embarking on a journey of my OWN design( how unfortunate a pun~!) Why is it I feel almost powerless having "branched-out from the mainstream"; which was supposed to be suitably-liberating for me!? Why is it I feel that I am being forced to give up time with everyone-else to do these things myself?

***end***

a random from my Sunrise-collection:















To continue from where I left off back there & then:
I quote what a relatively-new friend recently said to me: "your weakness is that you always think what is best for others but not you" , "sometimes, you just got to be a little bit selfish to pursue what is good for yourself. it is a matter of fact, and it is very common and alright to do so" .

I thought about it and realised that wasn't the first time I've heard those words said to me. My parents have said that before; especially during the tumultous secondary school-days of Brotherhood and Band activities... when I ensured ChìChiñg Utd FC made it on-time for our Sunday-morning matches or court-kick-abouts... when I made sure I was in the Band Room whilst encouraging Bandmates to come in and practise as much as possible(especially in the months before SYF-competition~!)

Wait.. does that mean I've been living like that all this while?
A life of servanthood treading between democratic-leadership and plain-mediocrity?
A life embracing my personal growth but with a reluctantance to accept the end of my "foundation-phase"; to move-on and to flap/beat/spread my wings and take flight?
An insignificant life that's been spent wastefully so far?

!
No
Not at all.
When I think about it again clearheadedly, everything that was done, had it's meaningful life-changing purpose after-all.

I think things changed when:
- I learnt how to draw (first with Dad/Mom guiding my hand, then from attending Pre-school Art Enrichment lessons:-)
- I learnt how to play soccer with my Pri-sch mates - with a plastic ball~! (Ruebs' and ZhiWei should be very familiar ;-)

Think things changed when
- I went into a Chinese mission-school with my lack of domestic(&daily) Mandarin-usage and secular lifestlye.
- I (unwittingly) joined the Band with no music-theory-background (& I thought the Yamaha-recorder in Pri Sch Music lessons was tough enough!)
- my Brothers came into my life and we formed ChìChiñg Utd FC, the social-support on and off-the-field :)
- I started hating Math~! :p
- you wrote to me ;-)

Things changed when
- An Art-teacher encouraged my artistic-growth and I decided to take up Art for my A-Levels.
- I decided to still take MathC if only to fufill Architecture's prerequisites.
- I unfortunately burst a lung.
- I met you again *timeless Stairway-Scene replays*

I believe all the above, being Captain, Band-Major and Pope was part of the plan. I believe that He was with me all along. Yes, it's been a long time coming. And still He remains faithful.

I finally believe, that the "miracles" I've experienced during my challenging-but-overall-smooth-sailing N.S-days were only granted through His amazing grace (credit also, to friends and family for their silent prayers). Although they weren't outrightly, explicit epiphanies, I'd like to give credit to the Almighty; for turning difficult circumstances around; for working through everyone who has blessed me so far~! Hopefully, I can reminisce & recollect more memories of the loving Father's works-in-my-life (from my "unbelieving" past) to share with everyone :o)

If there were anything more purposeful for us than living life itself, it'd probably be: Knowing God.
Which means so much more than just knowing about God.
May His bleesings touch your hearts always. :D

a random from my Sunset-collection:


What was once lost, has thus been found!
Onward, to discover God's will now~

Love, Actually hor

Deep bass-guitar, synthesizers, bongos and maracas provide a backdrop of a lovely Caribbean sunset.. before a sultry voice croons "I can't believe... You're a dream coming true... I can't believe... That I've fallen for you..." and piano & saxophone riffs add the icing to her creamy vocals... *"Fallen" by Lauren Wood*

Have you ever felt your heart acheing? Particularly, an intense longing for someone?
When you felt that way, you probably asked yourself: "Could this be Love? Am I in Love with..."

Love. Another one of life's mysteries.

******
I recently stepped into a Christian Book/Gift Shop out of curiousity... thinking I might be able to get something useful to guide me along my new walk of faith. In the store, they had set up a small TV up in one corner, with a video recording of some seminar being played-back.
Frankly speaking, I wasn't paying much attention to the "pastorly" voices coming from the video as I was browsing the books on offer.

However, something did catch my attention. A middle-aged-sounding voice proposed an analogy to do with maintaining marriages : "Marriage is like opening a joint-savings account("of emotions", I'd add) with your spouse."

The speaker went on to add:
"Everytime you tell your husband/wife little words of love or spend romantic-time together, you make a deposit into your savings account. Everytime you have a fight and get upset with each other, you make a withdrawal from that account. So the more you contribute to this savings account, the healthier your marriage will be"

Well, that was at least what I remembered and/or rephrased. So, not only does making a "withdrawal" not translate into spending-credits, it also damages your personal well-being(s).(not to mention the kids' too!) Though we can't actually spend these "savings", we only need to contribute a little a day for it to grow substantially overtime. This is possibly one of the best places to "invest" in because of the win-win situation & infinite "returns" overtime.

Okay, end of "financial" advice. ;-) But seriously, it's certainly a concept applicable to almost any aspect of life; be it attaining our life-goals or pursuing the love-of-our-life.

******

(Warning to love-cynics and skeptics, "Cliches ahead")
Since you might ask how it feels like, this is what goes through:

I wake up thinking of you. I turn to smile at "you". But all I have is your picture by the bedside. Ah... How I'd make you some breakfast if you were around..

The morning sunshine greeting me reminds me of your smiling face. Another day to work, a day closer to when we might embrace.

The day's barely halfway, and I wonder if you're doing fine. "Had yourself a nice breakfast(or brunch) already?" I'd ask, when I suspect you've gotten too busy to remember "meal-time".

By afternoon I'm thinking, how best to throw surprises - that won't squeeze your schedule tighter but still make your day brighter!

And when the day seems to get stuck at Tea
I have only to receive a msg from you; & my eyes light-up with glee;
and "Heaven Must Be Missing An Angel" starts playing automatically! :D

By evening-time, you've got your school-hours & I picture you
tinkling or tabulating away.. wonder if you've brought a jacket
to keep the chills at bay..

And even after our "Good night(s)",
I can't sleep till I know you're safely tucked in.

Otherwise, I pray you'll complete your late-night-task soon.
Looking wistfully at the bedside-picture, i drift off feeling over-the-moon~

******
Aye, all that might not have been the anticipated-reply to some insightful relationship-related blogposts that I've came across recently. ;-) But, this'll have to suffice while I think on the uncovered-topics further~!

Hallelujah

Some time ago, I got this gift from Jo's cell-mates over one post-service dinner (was actually a prize that the cell won from taking part in a Bible-Quiz) It wasn't my birthday or anything, but since the prize couldn't possibly be split amongst cell, they decided to give it to me (being a "guest" of sorts then.. hee) It was a porcelain-mug upon which a verse was printed on; in large friendly fonts, that read:

" You did not choose Me, but I chose you
and appointed you to go and bear fruit -
fruit that will last. Then the Father
will give whatever you ask for in My name. " John 15:16

I thought: Was that a prelude for greater-things to come?


******

A little side-topic:
Give those who you feel deserving a word of thanks. Acknowledge their efforts; because it reassures them. Shows your appreciation sincerely, for wholehearted-expressions beget love. We were not born to read one another's minds(literally-speaking), so speak we must~! But always, use your tongue wisely and let encouraging words leave your lips; as much as possible.
Gratitude.
Have you got your dose today? ;-)

******

Today's topic:
In all unlikelihood and un-Weirong-like actions, I did something quite unusual today. Went out for dinner with a person I barely knew: a cell-group leader from church. But, it proved to be a thoroughly meaningful experience eventually. We chatted over dinner about general affairs and of course some words about the faith; before moving-on to a more chat-friendly environment. & Pacific Coffee House with its plush red armchairs offered that.

"So what's holding you back?", KL asked.
"Well..." I paused a moment before adding on, "Apart from a few uncertainties about what a Godly-life encompasses, I think there's nothing else really".
I continued to elaborate as KL promptly clarified my concerns.
*phone-beeps*

******

"Did you know that one who behaves self-righteously is in God's eyes, but a piece of dirty-rag?" KL stated gravely and continued: "No one should tell God what he deserves to receive from Him; for no human-being can equal the goodness of God's love for us."

At that moment, his statement sparked a thought in my consciousness. I remembered I once held a belief that if I portrayed myself well in the eyes of others and served their needs, I was pleasing God(back then: unknown, nameless to me). Truthfully, I was even secretly revelling in my "status" as "Pope" to my bunch of closest friends. All that "glory" for nothing particularly "holy" or "Godly" that I did. Self-righteousness? Yes, upon retrospection.. oh yes.. that was me then.. part of the growing-up-phase where one finds his place-in-the-world and sense-of-belonging I guess. I confess my sin to you all now~ (-.-)

******

We left the comfy bistro for a quieter place. Outside, the air seemed cooler than usual(in the city-area especially), seemingly to welcome us into the night.

We settled at the foot of a long flight of steps that led toward Marina Square. (Quite symbolic actually, to think that this is where one starts "climbing-up")

I thought: "Alright, this is it."
I closed my eyes and was led through the Sinner's Prayer after which KL added-on his prayer for me. In a few minutes, "Amen".

I peeled-open my eyes to see the night-time city-scene just as before.
There wasn't any overwhelming feeling that came; but I felt a little spark inside ignited, a re-awakened sense of spirit, a spiritual-renewal! :) (Myb I should confess my sins more often to continuously feel this good) But seriously, I will have to devote time in the Word and prayer and etc.. to build upon that first step.

I remember KL said, "All you need, is to have a 'child-like' faith in God" "This is how we all begin our relationship with the Lord - with Faith"

Here is where I start "learning to walk again", i thought; "like a child led by his Father."

******

Now, a flashback to the *phone beep* up there^:
I was still deep-in-conversation w KL & I didn't check it till much later. The sms was a reply to a matter concerning school. But, surprisingly, that sms was amzingly-appropriate as a response to my reply to KL's question~! Excerpt of the sms: "... Thank God for that... Now's the time to complete it... " I was stunned at that "coincidence"... but as God's child, I shall say instead, that it was God (divinely intervening &) showing his love~!

******

Thank you, Lord God, for the blessings in my life; & for planting the seed of your love in all who are dear to me. From this day forth, I proclaim Jesus Christ as my Personal Saviour; and hold steadfast Your promises and purposes in my life; and yearn to grow more&more like Him. Amen.

:0)
Dear Brothers and Sisters, when I am more learned, I will share the good-news will you too~
God bless you all~

Brother Samuel

Flashback :

13th Jan 2001
ChiChing Utd's New Signing

Samuel Lim Liang aka "Jimmy" receives his club-shirt finally after leaving the Anglican Fields for Texas 1 year+ (as at the time of this event) ago. Physio-cum-Manager-cum-Centreback Daniel welcomes him home "officially" in this presentation-ceremony~
(P.S. This was actually Brother Zhiwei's 18th B'day.. an event which was attended by 17 in all; we had to open 4 tables up just to squeeze ourselves and the BBQ-steamboat-buffet dinner!)


******
I dialled the numbers. The person on the other end answered.
The deep voice was sounded strangely familiar and novel at the same time. Over the phone, his "not-especially-jolly-sounding"(myb even tersely) spoken "Hello" belies a warm, easy-going and humorous character. :p He's still just as laid-back in person as before.

I travel down the escalotor and saw a familiar face that smiled just frm the eatery a few paces away. Heh, he still looks the same. Maybe more formally dressed only, heh heh. His sister, her husband, & husband's parents were there with him; together with a little bundle of joy~!

Samuel: "Heh, I'm called 'Uncle Sam' now.." "Meet my niece, Esther~"
*3mth-old-chubby-looking-face-looks-around-everywhere-in-self-absorbed-manner*
WR: *smile* "Awww..."

******

WR: How've you been all this time?
S: "Been doing really good"
"Look" *proceeds to pinch a palmful along his tummy*
Both: *chuckle*
WR: "boy, when was the last time we met up?"
S: "Think it was some dinner; or somewhere maybe at Melvin's place"
WR: "Thought you came back once when we were still in the Army?"
S: "No, I think you all weren't in Army yet"
WR: "It seems like not long ago since you left"
S: "I've been in U.S. for 5 & a half years already eh~"
WR: "Oh yea.. you left straight after AHS~!"

******
updates about our Brothers, general happenings in SG, etc..
******

WR: "What made you decide to join the Bible School?"
S: "I've known these group of people who attend this school for a very long time already." "Since I was a kid even. I've always been a Christian although sometimes I don't go to Church; and never once thought about enrolling in Bible school~! But when I was in U.S, there was a group of fellow Christian students who I got to know, and regularly met-up with. In those sessions we got to hear each-others' personal experiences with the Lord. After some time, it softened my heart. There are times when I think about some good things that have happened in my life, I think they happen for a reason: Wow. God is really working in my life!
I let my parents know, spoke with my Sis(s) abt it too; and they were all ok with it. And so now the church, I was attending, is sponsoring my 2-yr course in Bible School. I kinda' like a 'missionary' now; heh heh.. So far, what I've learnt has been very meaningful and I'm really lucky that everything has been provided-for."
WR: "Wow. That's great. I'm really happy to hear all this"
S: "Yeah. Life's been great really~"

******

The flight beckoned.
We left the eatery to proceed to the Departure Hall at a leisurely pace.
Samuel takes this opportunity to carry Esther about along the way. His aunt-in-law mentioned: "By the time you come back, she'll be able to speak with you already~" :)

Then, once more, his family bade him their warmest farewell; with a hug from his sis too.
S: "See you in maybe 2 years"
WR: "Take care man~"
*wistful sigh*

Runaway Train

School design projects are managing my life now; threatening to turn me into an insomniac. The feeling now is akin to riding a steam-powered locomotive.. on creaky, old tracks that give you the feeling that your choochoo would derail any moment; built over a trecherous mountian/ravine terrain.. And even if it manages to keep on-track, I am suspecting where I will finally end up.. For this train has lost it's brakes~! Still, I've to keep feeding the coals into the furnace; or risk stopping along the old-tracks (over a ravine) that might give-way and leave me freefalling.
*gulp* (o.0)
Right. I must remain in control -.-"
I'll work it hard to take it as far as it can safely go~!
*shovels coke into hungry-engine*

******
1 week ago, the service I attended was closed with a mass-healing prayer-session. When the congregation was dismissed, a very special song was played. It was the only other familiar tune I could remember from AHS-Wednesday-Assembly days... Another memory-reel revisited and I was compelled to sit myself down. To soak-in the good ol' song and reflect on its significance once again.

So here it is.. (Brothers, I'm sure some of you all must find this familiar.(since so many of those songs on Wed-assembly were in Mandarin~!!))

"God Will Make A Way"
A:
Oh God will make a way
Where there seems to be no way
He works in ways we cannot see
He will make a way for me
He will be my guide
Hold me closely to His side
With love and strength for each new day
He will make a way.....
He will make a way

B:
By a roadway in the wilderess
He'll lead me
And rivers in the desert will I see
Heaven and earth will fade
But His Word will still remain
And He will do something new today

Repeat: A

******
I might beeee "gone" for quite a long time, but will try to update this space to show y'all I'm still pretty much alive and well (or rather "hanging-on-for-dear-life" hoho) :p
Later~

Contentment

Happy 47th Birthday, Mom~!
(oops, did I just reveal your age?..er, let's hope i rem wrong & added more years to it.. :))

got my Mom a pair of leather slippers from Leather Ark; Bugis Junction... I told her she needed some nicer footwear for casual-walking bcs she's been wearing this pair of maroon-sandals with slight heel (i dunno how else to call them?) for ages~! Plus, they were on offer, at a price I thought was reasonable for leatherware - $25 :D
We didn't get her a cake :< but we'll probably treat her to some place nice for dinner this weekend :D

******
" I've got plenty of nothing; and nothing plenty.
Got my Song... got Heaven all day long " - frm Porgy & Bess

******
Folks, I still can't count my blessings enough, for my life is abundant with more than just basic necessities now~! No, I've NOT struck Toto or won $1M in some lucky draw..

But what I do have, and hold dear to my heart, is really having meaningful human-relationships in my life~! I've got a loving family, a soccer-team's worth of Brothers & also someone special to keep in-mind. But alonside(or beyond?) these worldly blessings, I long to see God - the Father who has provided & wonderfully-enriched my life.

A friend said to me, "We're not getting any younger already"... As the years roll by, we may get too caught up with working our lives to fit our ideal futures; such that we lose a sense of child-like wonder and youthfulness that once allowed us to enjoy the simple things in life. Some of us had void-deck soccer(played w plastic-ball) kakis, whilst others were content just doodling with oil-pastels or flinging five-stones . And then as we grew up, some started wanting more "toys" to entertain themselves with - Nintendo & Sega consoles... and soon after, Playstations and Sega Saturns.. And when we're thrust into adulthood, although we've learnt how money works... we sometimes still crave for more gadgetry or luxury! There will never be enough to satisfy our already sophisticated lives... So think about it; whether something will actully make you happier before splurging on it.

Folks, I'm not asking you all to give up your 5Cs-dream, or go enrol yourselves in monestaries and live a religious, frugal life. My point to you all is that, do not fret over what you do not posess... Aim and achieve yes; but be content with what is already on hand, and feel blessed that you are not disabled or afflicted in anyway to enjoy life's basics. I heard a pastor say this recently, "Live simply, but don't simply live." I thought that was a piece of simple yet meaningful advice. So, if you just try counting your blessings; accounting for even the tiniest of tidings, you might come to realise how wealthy you already are~! :D


******
Now for a song:

I'm 15 for a moment
Caught in between 10 and 20
And I'm just dreaming
Counting the ways to where you are

I'm 22 for a moment
She feels better than ever
And we're on fire
Making our way back from Mars

15… there's still time for you
Time to buy and time to lose
15…there's never a wish better than this
When you only got 100 years to live…

That was an excerpt only; full lyrics here :)

Existence & Immortality

"Existence is how you remain in others' Hearts & Minds"
WJ: this was something I read from your Messenger "personal msg" some time back..

When I reflect on it, I think that has some profound meaning within. I think WJ meant "existence" to encompass not just a"state-of-being-alive-&-of-consciousness" but at the same time, "a-state-of-being-where-one-feels-a-sense-of-belonging"...

Take for instance, if one's only aim in live is to merely survive, he might choose to live alone. Like a hermit; in solitude, depending solely on himself and shunning human contact. This would be an extreme case of social-exile; but it illustrates the point of being "non-existent"- where even in death, no one is aware to mourn the passing. One's existence would be sadly pass-by unrecorded ... be rendered "negligible" even!,

On the other end of the spectrum, if one chooses to live a life where he abundantly-invests his time in things that involve the rest of humankind, he can be assured of perpetuating his name, the part of his worldly-existence that extends even after his body goes 6ft-under or is scattered as ashes. One must have a sense of belonging to his people(to even want to have anything to do with them), to even be compassionate in the 1st place, before being given any honour, let alone that of "perpetual-existence". However, the things that could grant one such "existence" could be far from good as well... i.e. Hitler's notoriety is associated with his ethnic-cleansing & war-mongering ways...

To infer further, existence beyond one's last breath; lies within others' hearts & minds. Such existence can even be considered as "immortality"~! If you think about all the history-makers the world has ever known, they are survived by their accomplishments or contributions; that have shaped the course of history as we know it today! Will expand on this topic at a less unearthly hour in future..
until then... "WR Out"~!

******
P.S. TagBoard has gone Kaput~! Their web-site seems to have crashed.. So for now,(myb in future) do use the newly-installed Chatterbox here~! :D

Immeasurable Joy & Thanks

:D
I'm feeling like the most contented 22yr-old-bloke in this world now~!
Thanks to Marcus & WanJun for party-planning & rawfood-preparation(applaudable nitty-gritty effort~!), Reuben for doing the groceries(finger-licking delectable treats~!), U-Wei & Juliet for Wine(mmm..hope y'all liked it?) & Apple Crumble(yummy~i'm sure y'all loved it!!) Daniel & Mandy for capturing the cheers on digital-film~ Appreciate the gifts frm Marc, WJ, Alvin & Gerald too.. But most of all, to the rest of you, my dear Brothers & Sisters:
Your presence alone was more than what I could ever ask for as a birthday-gift!!
Thank you all for coming together last evening to chill out & celebrate with me!

P.S.: I've to say I wasn't expecting anything more than your company, but well, well.. what a sneaky surprise from the gamemasters~!

& last but not least:
Thank you Jo, for being there; especially so when you've to take time off from your busy schedule and to familiarise yourself with the whole "family" that evening.
Thank you all; my Brothers & Sisters, for making her feel welcome too~! :D
******

A Star Is Born~!

Last Sunday, I went went with Bro Kerong & a mutual friend to support our dear Bro Melvin when he competed in the finals, of this local talentime competition(called Xin1 Yao2 Jie2 in Mandarin) featuring upcoming local Mandarin-song composers & performers:
******
Here are some snapshots of the event:

Not in the limelight
but still shining in his keyboard-performance of the song he co-wrote. Melvin is rapt in emotion here, playing "Kitchen" (Chu2 Fang2)














A Few Words
from the the composer himself(2nd frm left), after his second song. Yes, TWO of his songs made the cut for the Finals~!










Misc Shots:
























you can pretty much tell where we were seated from this shot.. lol.. ideal position for sniping photos w/o much intervention from ushers.. however, they did not seem to care much with ubiquitous camera-flashes throughout the event. Especially when guest-performer Gigi Leung came on stage to present two songs. My batteries were almost out then & I wanted to save the last bit for a Melvin-moment; just in case... so I couldn't take a shot of the HK diva~ >.<


It'll take more than chants and spells for your friend to win Pal.. heh heh... :-p











Melvin's song "Kitchen" wins the "Most Popular Song" award~!
Oops, I missed a chance to shoot the actual prize-presentation when the battery went dead crucial moment~!
The low-batt-beeping-alarm sounds as I go, "D'oh!" (>.<)
Strangely, after popping-out the batt from the camera & letting it "cool-off" for a while before popping it back in, I managed to catch this final group photo of all the participants and guests of honour~!
Well done Bro~!

"He"

A song I first heard in good ol' Anglican High school hall... So, I recently rediscovered it on this "AHS Musical Groups" compilation-CD we got in Sec 1, back in 1996.
Now, when I listen to it again, I feel the lyrics ring a familiar bell from long ago. Kinda like the chimes that the mass-broadcast speaker system play on the first noon of each month.
When I think about how I didn't receive Him back then, it's indescribably miraculous how I'm here today; acknowledging His presence and His love. I find this is a simple, yet emotive song about Him. I've got the MP3 if you'd like to hear it too.. For now, let's enjoy the words...

"He"
A
He can turn the tides
And calm the angry sea

He alone decides
Who writes a symphony

He lights every star
That makes our darkness bright

He keeps watch all through
Each long and lonely night

Chorus:
He still finds the time
To hear a child’s first prayer

Saint and sinner call
And always find him there

Though it makes him sad
To see the way we live
He'll always say,
“I forgive”

B
He can grant a wish
Or make a dream come true

He can paint the clouds
And turn the grey to blue

He alone knows where
To find the rainbow’s end

He alone can see
What lies beyond the bend

Chorus:
He can touch a tree
And turn the leaves to gold

He knows every lie
That you and I have told

Though it makes him sad
To see the way we live
He'll always say,
“I forgive”

******
Lyrics from www.gospelmusic.org.uk

Weiliang~21~Joseph

From left to right:

Douglas: Why is KorKor sitting on the floor~?
Derek: When will it be my turn~?

Weiliang: Why they make me wear this~!?












My brother,
this day,
you have come of age.

No more,
shall you be bound
to childlike freedom.

But hold on,
to that sense
of humility and love.

Trust,
what your faith
has provided you.

Forgive me,
if I have not done
my uptmost as a brother you.

If anything,
I bid you Truth, courage,
wisdom and compassion always.

God bless Mum & Dad;
God bless You

Forgotten Feelings

I was alone in my room doing some work on the computer with MediaPlayer on Auto-Playlist. During some moment of deep thought, the orchestral theme of that film started playing. And then the memory of days long past get replayed in a grainy, sepia-tinted mental filmstrip. Again.

Do any of you remember watching the animated film "The Land Before Time" ?
I loved that so much, my Mom/Aunts probably rented the video for me; to watch it over, more than a few times~

The main "crisis" of that film was about how pre-historic Earth's geography suddenly changed; seperating land masses and breaking apart "species" of dinosaurs (& their "families"). I can only remember the name of the main character, the little brontosaurus "Littlefoot", out of the rest of his migratory-mates. And so, the storyline centred around Littlefoot & gang as they made their way through many challenges; to finally rejoin their flock where greener pastures lay.
Littlefoot had several moments of doubt when encountering difficulties in his journey, but he felt better once he thought of his mother & how he longed to be with her again. However (of I didn't remember wrongly), he lost his Mom when she fell into a ravine during some violent, episodic tectonic-activity. I felt really sad for him~! And when the film showed him revisiting fonder memories of his Mom, my little heart was touched as well.. I think that film left a profoundly nostalgic impact on me; making me fear for the worst should my parents be gone suddenly...

******
*gulp* *a tinge of guilt surfaces in own conscience*
where did those feelings of cherishing parental-love go to, over the years?
actually, they're still very much within me; just that they've become somewhat like a buried treasure-chest over the years... one that I've hidden away for too long & not know where to find it again...
I think the problem also lies with not knowing how to express it in words... I find it easier to just help out with the laundry or dishwashing; but I know that to really feel that kind of family-love lies in establishing the elusive connection with spoken words of love and gratitude.
Hope to do that... before it's too late!

*sniff* (-.-)
******
If we Hold On Together - Diana Ross

Don't lose your way
With each passing day
You've come so far
Don't throw it away
Live believing
Dreams are for weaving
Wonders are waiting to start
Live your story
Faith hope and glory
Hold to the truth
In your heart

If we hold on together
I know our dreams Will never die
Dreams see us through To forever
Where clouds roll by
For you and I

Souls in the winds
must learn how to mend
Seek out a star
Hold on to the end
Valley, mountain
There is a fountain
Washes our tears All away
Words are swaying
Someone is praying
Please let us come
Home to stay

If we hold on together
I know our dreamsWill never die
Dreams see us throughTo forever
Where clouds roll by
For you and I

When we are out there
In the dark
We'll dream about the sun
In the dark
We'll feel the light
Warm our hearts
Everyone

If we hold on together
I know our dreamsWill never die
Dreams see us throughTo forever
As highAs souls can fly
The clouds roll by
For you and I

Deeply Inside

(edited)

When you feel all hope is gone, seek peace within yourself & He will give you strength!

Just Keep Swimming

Bling-Bling
Swarovski'es under the ice-cream tub lid
:p










Dear Friends,
if you've been disappointed by lack of postings, I apologise for every unfruitful trip you've made to this musty, cob-webby place that is mah' Blog. A wave of projects has swept across my academic-life that threatens to flood, spillover & drown out other aspects of me; but I reassure you that I'm still clinging on to my rubber duc.. er, dinghy.

So, to ye faithful bunch who still drop by, Thanks Very Much~! I'd wish you left me a note or two though~ Even a simple "Hello :)" or "Jiak4 Ba4 Buay3?" would be really encouraging~! =D As it is, my numerous concurrent creative-projects are squeezing me dry of creative-juice to produce nothing more than rough research sketches... Argh.. But I'll try to spice things up with a pic or two to support (or rather make up for) my wordy,weary rantings ;-)

******

By the way, bro Alvin's recent posts are National-Geographic & DiscoveryChannel worthy~!
Check out his latest post on his cute cuddly 8-legged pet; and in a previous post, huge swimming creatures ~! Eye-openers I tell you~!

******


Into the West
Not too clear here, but I thought the interplay between perspective and light in the actual scene was interesting~ :)







******
When I was prayed-for by R and E recently, I listened to every comforting word they each spoke & I felt "loved" inside.. I was both touched and grateful at their gesture.. but I was also saddened, because I didn't know if the Holy Spirit would come to me at all.. "Do I even deserve His Love?",I thought.

Once again, R's suggestion for me to continue praying hard echoed within. And so it shall be.
:o)

Finding His Way

caution: marathon post(s)

Today in school, I found myself surprisingly awake; despite having only roughly 4 hours of shut-eye. Firstly, I think it was by divine intervention that i even woke up w/o hearing the alarm ring~ I discovered later that my alarm was set to ring 12 hours later than intended~! Phone-clock was mixed up between a.m. and p.m.~!

Post-Dated:
Saturday 17th July
That must have been the first service I found myself somewhat disconnected from... most of the programme... But I believe there is purpose in it all. So, the emphasis was on "missions"; since it was the church's "missions festival" after all. But then there were some interesting testimonies:

There were two young people who shared their personal experience in missionary work. They were a 26yr-old lad and a 20yr-old girl. The man had been in the "missions-field" for about 7 years now; and he said he never felt any internal struggle or hesitation when he answered His calling. The girl however, said she had totally hated the idea of getting involved in overseas missions for a long time before. This attitude, she said; somewhat stemmed from her experience with her own missionary-father. He was very active in the mission-field & would frequently ask his daughters along if not they might not see him for up to months. But alas, during a service where her church's leaders were appealing for mission-volunteers, this girl who was still apprehensive & troubled by a nagging feeling, finally found it within herself to say, "Yes, I'll go~!". & as she said that, she immediately felt more at peace inside, despite the change of heart. And somewhat ironically as well, on her maiden mission to Timor-Leste, she became the 1st amongst her family members to spend more than 6 months away on a mission.. she was there for 1 whole year in fact~! She chuckled when she mentioned that she found that she even put on 10kg from her stay there; pointing out that a missionary's simple way of living does not mean having to starve...

An interesting piece of history Pastor BL related to us went something like that: Around 1266A.D, (Mangu &) Kublai Khan; son(s) of Genghis Khan, was ruling over the vastest empire ever held by the Mongol empire. Two Venetian merchants, Maffeo and Niccilo Polo, were brought before the Mongul rulers. After receiving the Mongul court's hospitality, the two Polos were sent on their way with a letter in Turki addressed to Pope Clement IV asking the Pope to send him 100 learned men to teach his people about Christianity and Western science. When the Polos completed the 3year-journey home, the Pope had passed away. When the Polos set off toward China once again, they only managed to bring with them two friars and gifts for the Khans. However, the friars turned back because of some difficulties faced early along the route. Thus, the Khans never received the 100 learned-men they had requested for. And the Mongul-rulers embraced Tibetan Bhuddism instead. And then Pastor BL said: Christianity's greatest evangelistic-opportunity ever, had passed on; His "hour of visitation" had gone. (You can read up more here; although not all the above revealed during the service are included)

Another issue discussed was about sacrifice.. Matt 26:6-13 were the verses highlighted...
The virtues of "courage" and "sacrifice", examplefied by the woman recorded in those verses; were then re-emphasised again in the Pastor's appeal for volunteers in the year-end mission to Timor-Leste.

& a meaningful quote was presented:
"He is no fool who gives
what he cannot keep
to gain that which he cannot lose"
- Jim Elliot(missionary who did not survive mission to bring the Word to natives in Ecuador's jungles)

******
Friday 15th July
Alas, the final installment in our musical buffet. What an enjoyable time it has been~ But, guess not all good things come to an end yea *wink* ;o) Most importantly, it was joyous _____ ____ ___~

******
As i skipped along the pathway toward the estates' gates, it was already starting to drizzle. I hurried and heard the sound of a plastic-card hitting the tarmac. I looked back & saw nothing unusual. Then, before i took another step, I reached for my shirt-pocket & realised that my EZ-link card was missing~! *That explained the sound~!* Ah, I almost panicked but retraced my steps and saw a small, dark drain(with metal grille cover) by the sidewalk. Oh man~! But before I imagined the worst, I bent down & felt the familiar plastic of an object right at the edge of the roadside-drain opening~! I wiped off some dirt from the surface and put the card safe back into my wallet. He's not let me down; get lost or leave me stranded since I began my personal walk. *smile* Thank You God~!

******
Could it be that: The Creator's test is set in our daily lives; in our very own mortal existence?

If it would do You justice, I'd strive for the what is lovely in Your eyes... but I cannot speak Your Word when I myself have not grasped it. So I pray that You build me up; to last the distance; so that I will confidently become a mouthpiece for Your word.

How shall I ask Him?

(Belated Post)
Last night
It was not your everyday sight on the usual Bedok North Exit from PIE... Not 30m into that tricky bend, we passed a sedan that had crashed into the left-side wall of the curved-road. I gazed in partial shock & amazement; at the rather mildly damaged(front was slightly crumpled with light smoke rising from under the bonnet) vehicle. Its driver & passenger in front (thankfully) seemed to be unscathed. The taxi-driver who I was riding with immediately exclaimed to me that, that very car had just overtook us not more than a minute ago before driving into the same exit. Now look where the provisional license holder has "parked".

******
One night before:
I said perhaps food and drink eases one into conversation & merry-making...
& so there I was...
in a sea of unfamiliar people; with only a few new acquaintances and you...
This I felt was what I had to do.. To aspire towards that similar joy in all those faithful hearts, I guess I have to seek and speak to those who are experiencing it in the now~!

******
& then, he suggested praying for me with another with church-mate. The words were meaningful no doubt. But they did not emote me to feel compelled to embrace the faith. & Richard said to me, "Perhaps you're not being serious enough.. But do not worry... If you should decide to challenge God to show Himself to you, He will speak to you if you pray hard enough", So that's what's left to do. To sustain my faith in Him not through seeing his physically-manifested Work; or hearing his spoken Word,, but through sheer faith.. even when I fall to my darkest hours; continue to pray I must.

******
Do not worry, for you did not desert me then -
for "our communion was not bound to words" or physical presence...
but i hope; unltimately in true faith and spirit.
:-) *contented smile*

Silently

Somewhere in this previous post , I talked abt one of nature's gifts - mutual unspoken understanding. Back then, when I only had my Chiching Brothers, I mused often about how I'd like to develop that kind of bond with someone special someday. Now, I'm elated to be actually working on it!

More specifically about matters of the heart:
So far, I find standing by these "universal-rules" has helped in the initial stages:
- consideration; respect for both parties' background, ways-of-life, personalities & percularities
- commandments; derived from the above, to do with respect
- communication; maintaining contact to bridge distances, that endures even periods of absence/silence
- community; on top of companionship; participation within the parties' social circles
- conscientiousness; of the above C's, without fail; but with forgiveness

Not the absolute set of C's by all means... but think these are kinda working well for us~ (you think so too? ;-)

******

& then after the energetic, charismatic worship, the Pastor reminded us about the importance of having "silence" & being comfortable in it.. so that we do not miss the slightest whisper from our Lord.. (& I thought:) or maybe, to even hear His "breathing" - His living-presence amongst us mortals.

Safety Gear

of parachutes and oxygen tanks and body armour...

It's an exhilarating feeling to have sky-rocketed myself into various new ways of life; its challenges & situations. It's the greatest ever, since N.S-days.. or really, since for the longest time in my life.. Heh~
It's looking bright and cheery now at 14,000feet(ask U-Wei abt his real sky-diving experience in Aussie) but think I've gotta make it to the ground soon. Get down to earth. Get hands dirty with proper work now. If not, hanging up in the skys will only get me sucked into a thunderstorm sooner or later~!

I think I'm free-falling now...
Parachutes? *check*

Ooh Yeah~

Reporing live frm LaSalle-SIA's DM-101 (Computer Lab)~!

I'm in the midst of the most babelicious looking beauties ever known to geek-kind; or mankind for that matter! Somebody spank me! Woohoo! My Design Technology module; in which I'm taught new sofware, is conducted in a computer-lab with the latest oh-so-lovely POWERMAC G5ives~! the 25 terminals each come with 20INCH CINEMA DISPLAYS~!! Wahhhh~!!! I'm drowning in my own drool already~!!

On a more serious note:
My classmates(who have by now dispersed into where I can only imagine as out-of-school since there is no class until 6:30pm later) told me that Adobe Illustrator is a more powerful software. Hmm, that gives me some consolation over my lack of Macromedia Freehand-knowledge. good thing I picked up basic Photoshop over the past months too! Later, I learn from my DT lecurer/tutor Yulius, that the Powermac G5s were a recent addition. They just replaced them last semester, upgrading from the years-old G4s.. Boy am I lucky to have come in at this time =) Yulius mentioned that the Mac versions of the Adobe software do not differ very much from the PC. Only some keyboard-shortcut differences. Otherwise, all the same in terms of functionality. *phew*

Ok, my stomach is calling again. Although my fingers waant to stay glued to the keyboard; & my eyes want to continue ogling at the 20" Display, I have to get sustenance to keep up. Oh, & I better visit the library to start research later.. Darn..

adious~ for now...